Finding Purpose in Pain: Why We Suffer and What It Means.
Life is full of challenges, and no matter how much we try to avoid them, suffering often finds its way into our journey. As Philip Santus wisely said, “If suffering is inevitable, if our problems in life are unavoidable, then the question we should be asking is not ‘How do I stop suffering?’ but ‘Why am I suffering — for what purpose?'”
This perspective shifts our focus from fighting against pain to understanding its purpose. But how can we turn our suffering into something meaningful? Let’s explore this idea in simple terms and find solutions to embrace the struggles of life with a fresh mindset.
Why Do We Suffer?
Suffering can feel pointless when we’re in the middle of it. However, there’s often a deeper reason behind the pain we experience. Here are a few common reasons why suffering may arise:
- Growth and Learning Life teaches us through experiences, both good and bad. Many times, it is in moments of difficulty that we grow the most. Pain forces us to reflect, adapt, and sometimes change course. Just like muscles grow stronger after being stretched and torn during exercise, our character develops through struggles.
- Connection to Others Suffering helps us relate to others. When we experience pain, we become more empathetic and understanding toward those who are going through similar challenges. This shared human experience builds deeper relationships and reminds us we’re not alone.
- Discovering Purpose Pain often leads us to ask bigger questions: Why am I here? What is the meaning of all this? These questions can push us to find clarity in our values and priorities. They can help us uncover our purpose and realign our lives with what truly matters.
How to Turn Suffering Into Purpose
Now that we know suffering can serve a purpose, how do we move forward and find meaning in our struggles? Here are some practical steps:
1. Reflect on the Cause of Your Pain
Take time to understand the source of your suffering. Is it due to a mistake, a loss, or a situation beyond your control? Write down your thoughts and feelings. This helps you process emotions and identify lessons hidden within the pain.
2. Focus on What You Can Control
Often, we suffer more because we focus on things we cannot change. Shift your attention to areas where you have influence. For example, if you’ve lost a job, you may not control the economy, but you can improve your skills, update your resume, or network with others.
3. Ask Yourself: What Can I Learn?
Every challenge comes with a lesson. Instead of asking, “Why me?” ask, “What can I learn from this?” Maybe your heartbreak is teaching you to love yourself first, or a financial struggle is showing you how to be resourceful.
4. Help Others Through Their Pain
One of the quickest ways to find meaning in suffering is by using your experiences to support others. If you’ve overcome something difficult, share your story. Your journey might be the inspiration someone else needs to keep going.
5. Adopt a Long-Term Perspective
In the moment, pain can feel overwhelming. But when you look back on past struggles, you often see how they shaped you into a stronger person. Remind yourself that this pain, too, will pass, and its purpose will become clearer with time.
Real-Life Examples
- Personal Growth Through Failure Many successful people talk about their failures as stepping stones. For example, J.K. Rowling faced countless rejections before Harry Potter became a global phenomenon. Her struggles motivated her to persist and eventually achieve her dreams.
- Empathy Through Loss Losing a loved one can be devastating. But many who experience grief go on to become advocates for causes like mental health awareness or charity work, turning their pain into a way to make a difference.
- Resilience Through Hardship Athletes often endure physical and mental struggles, yet these challenges make their victories even sweeter. They find purpose in pushing their limits and inspiring others to do the same.
Final Thoughts
Pain is an unavoidable part of life, but it doesn’t have to be meaningless. By asking the question, “Why am I suffering—for what purpose?” we can uncover lessons, grow stronger, and even help others. Remember, suffering is not the end of the story—it’s a chapter that leads to growth and purpose.
So, the next time you face challenges, don’t just ask how to escape them. Instead, ask yourself: What can I learn? How can I grow? Who can I help? When you find those answers, you’ll discover that even pain has a purpose.
